Chapter 1: The Note Inside the Bear

My husband and our three sons d!ed during a storm on their guys' trip — five years later, my youngest daughter came to me and said, "Mom, I know what really happened that day.

The police officer lied to you."

My husband, Ben, and I had eight children — five girls and three boys.

When our sons got slightly older, we started a tradition: Ben would take them away from home for a few days to stay at a cabin.

It was their special guys' getaway.

But five years ago, when Ben took our three sons on one of those trips, they never came home.

Ben lost control of the car during a storm.

Later, the police discovered his overturned vehicle in the woods.

No one made it.

Our family friend Aaron was one of the police officers who responded to the scene that day.

He told me the car had likely gone off the road and rolled down a hill several times, so there was no way anyone could have survived.

My life shattered in an instant.

I didn't even know how I was supposed to keep living.

God, I cried each day, wondering if the pain would ever ease even a little.

I searched for the strength to keep going for my five daughters.

I kept going over what had happened again and again in my head.

Ben had been taking the boys to that cabin for years.

He was the kind of person who always checked the weather forecast and ensured the gas tank was full.

If he knew bad weather was coming, would he really have driven the boys through the woods?

Or had he somehow forgotten to check the forecast that one time?

Five years passed, and I still missed Ben and our sons every single day.

Lately, my youngest daughter, Lucy, had started asking increasingly more questions about what had happened to her father and brothers.

She had only been six when it happened, so I understood why she wanted to know more.

I tried to tell her the truth, but it was deeply painful to talk about, so I avoided going into too much detail.

But Lucy continued asking questions.

And sometimes, she'd do the opposite and lock herself in her room, digging through boxes of old things for reasons I didn't understand.

Then last night, Lucy stepped into my bedroom and woke me up.

I jolted awake and asked:

"Honey, is everything okay?"

Her voice was shaking when she said:

"Mom, I found something — a note Dad hid inside my stuffed bear, the one I used to play with when I was little.

I found the bear, and the note fell out."

I couldn't understand what was going on, but I tried to stay calm.

"Honey, what are you talking about?

What note?

What does it say?"

Her eyes filled with tears.

"Mom, I know what really happened to Dad and my brothers.

The police officer lied to you.

It wasn't anything like what Aaron told you."