For 20 years, my mother fed the homeless boy behind our house. After her funeral, he held my hands and whispered, “Before she d.i.e.d, she made me promise never to reveal her secret.”

 

“You don’t have to like me,” he said quietly, not moving to pick it back up. “But your mother worries when you walk near the road traffic after school.”

I ignored him and kept walking, telling myself his concern was just another trick, another way of stealing a little more of my mother’s attention for himself.

 

As far as I knew, Cole had no parents, no home, no job. Mom never once explained, in all those years, why she seemed to feel personally responsible for a stranger’s teenage son. I stopped asking eventually, the way children stop asking questions they’ve decided will never get a satisfying answer.

 

I stopped asking eventually.

He vanished from the dump sometime before I finished high school. Mom wouldn’t say where he’d gone, and by then I’d stopped caring enough to push.


The moment I graduated, I moved three hours away, took the cheapest apartment I could find, and called home only when guilt outweighed the effort. Mom and I spoke on birthdays first, then holidays, then eventually only on the occasions when one of us finally felt bad enough about the silence to break it ourselves.

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