I walked back into the courtyard.
I didn’t run.
I didn’t raise my voice.
I carried the envelope at my side and I crossed the open space between the hedges and the front steps with the same steadiness I had used to carry trays for eight-hour shifts and file insurance forms at midnight and smile at Nathan every morning while he studied and I got ready for work.
Nathan saw me coming.
His smile flickered.
His mother, Eleanor, was standing beside him in a pale blue dress.
She saw me too.
She didn’t smile.
She looked at the envelope.
“I think we should talk,” I said.
Nathan’s voice came out too smooth, too practiced.
“This isn’t the place.”
“You chose the place,” I said.
“You handed me papers in front of two hundred people.
So yes, this is the place.”
Eleanor put her hand on Nathan’s arm.
“Nathan, perhaps—”
“How long have you known?” I asked her directly.
She didn’t answer immediately.
That was its own answer.